Why is my head so crazy all the time?

Years of crazy thoughts, a rubbish bin full of pointless images that get sent from somewhere in side my brain, I wonder if there is a little guy in there throwing them like a frisbee so i catch them. 

i sit and wonder where they manifest from what part on my brain do they come from. I wonder if there is some sort of sequence that gets puts in place for them to actually start in the first place...all systems check? Huston we are go for launch, Then boom we have lift off.

a machine gun firing out hitting the inside of my forehead, Bouncing around in the front of my head until i finally catch them.

i sit and think if i can shrink my self to go in my mind maybe i can meet this little guy face to face, But then i laugh and think?... This is another stupid thought, Another silly idea that has probably came from this little guy in the first place.

i shut my eyes and see many faces, but the faces are distorted blobs of silhouettes floating by, but who are they? Are they images of my thoughts?

yes they are! they are faces that represent my memories, some are mean faces, some are scary faces, But then i think where are all the happy faces? Maybe this little guy has captured them and rounded them up in a corner somewhere?

i sit in the center of a dark room, How did i get here? i see faces coming from out of the walls and they laugh, Pointing there fingers, while holding my head in between my legs curled up in a ball. I had no thoughts and no actions, how on earth did i get here and where the hell am i, I notice in the corner a voice, a very quiet voice asking me to get up, asking me to come on over, i couldn't as the fear was high, i kind of froze in the same spot, but how long have i been here? i cannot say as time was non existent.

Maybe this isn't reality? maybe this is me in my mind? I turned to the voice in the corner and crawled across the soft wet floor, a hand reached out to me, the hand and the roughness of the skin was familiar but i couldn't work it out where i have seen it?

I reached out with my hand and noticed it was the same as mine? shocked! 

i realized this was me, Some how i gained the strength to rescue my self. i took the chance,

i landed in a land of reality, A field of grass that i sunk into i felt safe.

I picked my self up while my tears fell, but there was nothing, nothing around me and that hand that pulled me out of that dark place had gone?

i got given the chance to be me again to start over, like a clean slate, a fresh start.

but why am i so empty? questioning everything searching for an answer, but there wasn't any there, i heard a voice from inside that was getting quieter and quieter, the voice shouted i will return i will be back?

I sat back down and cried some more, but it was relief as that voice that was getting quieter was that little guy who was dying inside of me. 

he let me be, he let me breath, he let me see, see me lying on the ground so i guess this is me, to start a fresh that i always wanted. Now i can be me!